Other Men’s Experiences with Beautiful South American Women
I have to write this because I just read your “hate” mail and the response by Amy from the United States. I cannot believe the bias this woman has toward your services and others like it. Amy clearly has not been to South America, talked to the people, or experienced the lifestyle. I have. I am a young executive with a large international company; I guess I could even be regarded as “Mr. Big.” I have spent quite a bit of time working, visiting, and traveling in South America, and the bulk of my time has been in Bogotá. I fell in love with the city, its people, and the lifestyle. I have never seen such friendly people. I would hardly call them impoverished. They have tremendous pride in themselves and in their country.
The Latin women I met were very kind and passionate, and not once did I feel like they were just looking for a visa. In fact, the few women I got to know on a more personal basis would have been much happier for me to stay in Bogotá than move to Canada. Not only are these women beautiful, but many also have very high morals and values that we seem to have lost in North America. I know a few Americans who have moved to Bogotá to be with the woman they fell in love with. After meeting some great women in South America, it was very hard to go back to the typical “American woman.” Now that I am at a point in my life where I want a wife and a family, I am glad you offer services that make it easier to meet and get to know a woman before visiting.
Amy, you can’t begin to compare yourself with the women of South America, who would never judge people the way you do. Amy calls us losers, but I would ask her this: Would a loser hold an executive position in one of the largest food companies in the world? Would a loser pass up the chance for happiness with a Latin woman and keep searching for something that simply isn’t there in the U.S.? You are right, Jamie, when you talk about personal preference. Like everything in life, some things appeal to you more than others. Even if I don’t find the special someone through your service, I still commend you for what you are doing for others, and I am sure you have already brought together many very happy couples. I wish you the greatest success.
We, as North Americans, have largely lost what attracts me so much to South Americans. The women in South America are very special, and to me their Latin heritage produces wonderfully beautiful, sensual, and exciting women. The men are strong, but often fall short of social expectations, which has hurt the state of marital happiness for generations. NOTE: Most North Americans, especially the women, do not know the real meaning of machismo. Their families are whole and strong, and the entire population is passionate about everything. These are people descended from the Mayans, the Aztecs, the Incas, and royal Castilian Spanish, who flourish, celebrate, and take time to live and love. The “Latina” has held to virtues that might be described as “the joy of being a woman”: taking pride in feminine grooming, appreciating that men are men, wanting to nurture a tight-knit family, and valuing a husband who provides a comfortable home while she tends to the comforts and needs of the immediate and extended family—and, I must add, doing so without keeping score over household chores.
After traveling the world with my wife for eight years, and then for another eight years after her death from breast cancer, I have seen up close the dilemma that many South American women face, the problem often referred to as machismo. After returning to North America, I have also seen up close the so-called “liberated” North American woman, who now faces major increases in alcoholism, drug abuse, and heart disease, along with a clear decline in standards of dress and feminine grooming—not to mention children who are undisciplined and disrespectful.
In this liberated state, many of us are generally divorced by around age 36 (with roughly half of marriages ending in divorce), embittered, embattled, and lost.
I have had the misfortune of dating a few women from the U.S.A. recently and have been severely disappointed—and sometimes horrified—by the lifestyle they lead. This has nothing to do with their economic situation. They are simply unavailable to their children, their home, the man of the moment, and ultimately to themselves. They have unreasonable expectations of their men, tattoos, old-looking and overly casual attire, unkempt hair, soiled laundry tossed in piles, and, most of all, an anger that I do not understand. This state of chaos is simply not found in South America. Even the poorest families have clean laundry on the line, respectful children, and a smile on their face.
Your hate-mail section is interesting, and by publishing some of those messages you have certainly exposed the disarray and anger that many Western women carry. The idea that Latina women are almost always impoverished—and therefore somehow bent toward prostitution or desperate marriage—only shows the ignorance of the accuser. It is incredible to me that anyone would try to condemn something they know nothing about. And if the truth were stated plainly, no Latina would choose to live the way many Western women do today. They certainly do not need to be “saved” by our frustrated, poorly groomed, and perpetually angry Western female.
I suppose that when an entire generation of women is being cast aside in favor of something better, those women will display anger and frustration. It clearly sends a message that your service, and others like it, exist and grow because they fill a genuine need. There is obviously a need, and you are speaking to that need—for both the Latina and the American male, both of whom are tired of the constant conflict. The origin of that need becomes evident very quickly, and I suppose that is grounds for anger, though that anger should be turned inward, not outward.
One cannot apply Western values to South American virtues, as they are not comparable. The word “values” is very different from the word “virtues.” They are two different words with two entirely different meanings. Hitler had values. The Latina is looking for male virtues, while the North American male is looking for comfort and appreciation—things he genuinely values. I have never been able to understand this new idea that offering comfort to your husband is somehow weak or subordinate.
I think we are fortunate to live in an age where messages can be sent and introductions can be made via the Internet at light speed. This technological achievement has made the world immensely smaller. Now the victims of South American machismo can converse with the underappreciated North American male, and new love can be born, nurtured, and appreciated by two individuals contributing from two entirely different cultures.
Thank you for enabling this endeavor with your fine service, and do not worry about the naysayers. The North American male has stopped looking for his “feminine side” and has begun looking south for an attractive, feminine, appreciative woman who is happy to be a woman and who yearns to care for a good man. I have come home only to miss what I experienced in South America. Your service offers mucho.
In 2000 I had my own business and lived and worked in the Miami area. I was in the process of going through a divorce from a typical American woman when I met and fell in love with a terrific woman from Colombia. She had been married to a Colombian man and was in the USA legally, and she needed nothing from me to stay in the country. I had always wanted to get to know a Latin woman, but she was the first “Latina” I ever had a relationship with. We were together for six years before it ended, and those were the best years I have ever spent with any woman.
My desire to seek out Latin women does not come from desperation but from my experiences in South and Central America. During my career I worked in Chile and Brazil, lived in Brazil and Panama, and traveled to Colombia and Argentina. While living and working abroad I experienced the different ways that Latin American people approach life. Here in the USA we need two incomes just to support our lifestyles. We get up, go to work, go home, eat, work some more, go to bed, and start over the next day. We spend no time with our families, and the only time we see our neighbors is when we put out the garbage or when we are pulling into or out of our driveways. This is NOT LIVING, it is EXISTING. And do you know why we do this? To “keep up with the Joneses” so we can buy our flat-screen TVs and get our wives the BMW SUV they want to park next to the Jet Ski we never use. Latin Americans have a different approach to life. Their priorities are family, friends, and then work (money). For them, quality of life does not come from money and possessions but from quality time spent with family, children, and friends. I am not saying they do not want nice things, but NOT when you have to sacrifice being with your family or friends to achieve them.
I’d like to address the point about women from matchmaking websites only looking for “papers.” The Latin women I have met in my life are looking for love like everyone else, but above all they are looking for a man who treats them with respect. Unfortunately, many Latin men are very macho and terrible womanizers (ask any Latin woman in Miami), and in this great modern age of communication these women have discovered that there is a place where many men treat their women with respect: the USA. However, for the women on matchmaking websites who are willing to look for love and respect outside their home countries, it comes at a terrible price. Most must leave the families and friends they have always known and move to another country. So if one of these women is looking for “papers” and ends up married to a “loser” (a man who does not treat her with respect), she will go back home to her family and friends rather than stay and be treated poorly, even if she was originally looking for “papers.”
Another quality Latin women possess is their almost fanatical desire to look good. They take care of their figures and love to dress in a feminine way. There is nothing more beautiful on this planet than a woman, regardless of what she weighs. But when a Latin woman gets dressed, she is going to look good, and whatever she wears will be very feminine and appealing. You will NEVER see a Latin woman wearing a T-shirt down to her thighs because she is ashamed of the size of her butt. Latinas are all woman, and whether they are getting dressed for soccer, the mall, the grocery store, or a dinner out, they leave no doubt in your mind about their femininity, no matter what their size.
So why would you want to work 60 hours a week, spend no time with your children or friends, all just to keep a materialistic, ashamed-to-look-feminine American woman happy? I can’t imagine why, and in my opinion you would have to be crazy—unless you simply didn’t know there was another option. When the time comes and I am ready for another relationship, I will seek out another Latin American woman. And fortunately, if I am in an area where there isn’t a significant Latin population, there are websites like this one that can help me find the kind of woman I want to be with.
I read your hate-mail letter from Amy. Man, she sounds exactly like my ex-wife. (I actually tried to cut and paste it into an email to friends because they would have sworn it was her.) Everything in her message is precisely why I swore I would never date another American woman again. Four years ago I spent five weeks in Brazil during a vocational exchange through work. I left this country still drooling over blonde hair and Anglo smiles, and I returned convinced that women from Latin America are far more suited for me. Not because I would strike out with American women—not by any stretch of the imagination. By American standards, I had plenty to offer: the BMW, the vice-president title, the good salary. And I am loyal, moral, and a good man. In my case, I grew up in the Northeast with European grandparents, and my mother was a first-generation American. In Brazil I found that Latin women held more firmly to the European value system I had been raised with and felt more comfortable around.
A year ago I married a lovely girl from Ecuador whom I met, coincidentally, here in the United States. My best friend was of the same mind and eventually married a Chinese woman whom he also met here in the States. Neither of our wives needed us for green cards. When I met my current wife, she already had a green card, was gainfully employed with a Fortune 100 company, and had applied for her citizenship. And like many of the girls I met in Brazil, she came from a very good family. She was used to a life with maids and servants and attended the finest private schools. The bottom line is that when I am sick, she never leaves my side; when I come home, we cook together and have dinner; and when we visit her family, they treat me as one of their own, without any suspicion. We are very much in love with each other. The finer points of being a gentleman—like opening car doors and pulling out a chair when she sits down at a restaurant—are lost on American women today, but very meaningful to my Latin wife. She enjoys being treated like a lady and does not assume such gestures are motivated by some hidden agenda.
Unfortunately, my ex-wife’s response to my marriage to a South American woman is very similar to the senseless name-calling and racist remarks in Amy’s letter. What is most disturbing to me—as it should be to anyone—is not just how mean-spirited her letter was, but how it presumed that American women are somehow above the rest of the world, so perfect and so unattainable that any man not worthy of their affection must be “exiled” to seek the attention of desperate third-world women.
That kind of thinking is so incredibly racist and bigoted that it makes me ashamed to say I come from a country where someone would write such a thing. I commend you for your service. Not everyone is lucky enough, as I was, to find a lovely Latin bride already established here in the United States. If you don’t live in New York, Florida, Chicago, or Southern California, it must be incredibly difficult to find such a rare beauty. Your service does well by offering people the chance to seek something better in life than frozen pizza and the occasional dinner out at Applebee’s.
I am a 45-year-old single man who did what he wanted with his life and now wants to settle down. I love Latina women and have had long-term relationships with those born in the U.S. These were good women—honest and sincere—and I loved one of them dearly. I would have married any one of them, except for a few problems. Most American women (Latina or otherwise) are spoiled by the American way of life. They expect everything and put you down or dump you when you cannot provide it. Their mothers teach them to “go for the gold” from the time they are little girls, and when they get into relationships, they judge the quality of the relationship by the material things they have. Some of them are damaged by absent fathers and bitter mothers who try to punish the father by teaching their daughters to use men for what they want and to dump them if they don’t get it.
At my age, the majority of women I meet have already been married, have had children, and are simply looking for someone to spend their golden years with. I have a hard time with this because I have never been married and I want to experience everything for the first time and know what it’s like. I’m not saying these are bad women at all. I’m saying that the eligible pool of never-married women without children who are 35 and older is very small. Once a woman has been married the first time, every relationship she has afterward will in some way be shaped by that first marriage, and it becomes the benchmark for any relationship you will have with her.
I have met and known women from South America who have immigrated to the U.S., and they are not raised like American women. They are not pretentious by nature and are taught to value family above all else. Once they make a commitment, they stick to it for life. They accept their roles and make sacrifices as needed (within reason) to keep the relationship and family intact. This is very important to a man when he is busting his ass and doing everything he can to provide for his family when times are extremely tough. No man wants to go home and face even more humiliation and degradation when everything he can do is still not good enough. Eventually, he stops going home, which leads to the situation we have now that makes foreign women desirable to American men. It is the women who hold everything together in society, and American women have forgotten that—or were never taught it.
I have found—and hopefully will marry—a Colombian woman. (I just wish it didn’t take so long to get her here.) She doesn’t care about fancy things, where she will live, or what she will drive. (She doesn’t even drive in Colombia. I already have a car waiting for her here!) What she cares about most is that I love her, that I want to marry her, and that I want to start a family. She doesn’t even care about coming to the U.S. She wants to live in Mexico! Baja is sounding better and better to me. Everyone should experience true love and the innocence that goes along with it at least once in their lives, and if marrying a foreign woman is the way to find it, then more power to them.
This Amy woman has obviously experienced some kind of abuse or conditioning, or perhaps she’s jealous because American guys are looking elsewhere for women. With her attitude, who would want to marry her? She thinks American men who seek foreign women are useless low-lives. She should take a good look in the mirror. She is exactly the kind of woman I want to avoid.
I felt compelled to email you regarding some of the “hate-mail” directed at your website and the services it offers. There are many reasons why men would look into such a service, and I’d like to present one of them. I’m a university-educated Latin American man who was raised in Canada and still lives here. I am not a wealthy man, but I am financially, physically, and emotionally secure. I consider myself young at 37 years of age and thought I would throw my two cents’ worth of opinions into the ring. I’ll keep this as brief as possible.
I’ve dated Canadian women all my life, and I suspect they are not much different from American women. They are smart, funny, independent, beautiful, and yes, sometimes difficult. But I imagine that’s the case with all women—otherwise relationships would be easy, right? Still, I always sensed something missing in these relationships, something that kept me from taking the next step into marriage.
A few years ago, I finally got my answer. Many of my friends encouraged me to travel to Europe, but instead I chose to travel through Central and South America. I visited Mexico, El Salvador, Colombia, Peru, and Chile, just to name a few. My intention was to reconnect with my “roots,” to see where I came from. Instead, I experienced something deeper—an awakening I couldn’t put into words. Back in university, they once made us read a book called Man’s Search for Meaning. Without going into endless detail, that trip answered the question for me. I was surrounded by people who were just like me—similar values, similar histories, similar views on life, and similar aspirations. Those were the “qualities,” if you will, that had been missing from my past relationships.
Now, getting back to the subject of using this website and the services it offers. Living in Canada does not give me many opportunities to meet Latin women who come from where I come from. This website (and others like it) offers men like me the chance to meet single Latin women whom I simply cannot meet here.
I must say that I am quite a novice when it comes to using the services of an agency, as I have never felt the need to do so until now. However, after going through your site and reading the hate mail you’ve received, I am even more convinced that you are an upstanding individual.
I have traveled extensively around the globe (I am a four-million-miler with Delta) and have lived in Brazil, the Philippines, Japan, Canada, and the USA. After living in and traveling to more than 80 countries, and having had the opportunity to meet women from many different cultures, nationalities, socio-economic backgrounds, and levels of education and sophistication, I can say your statements are absolutely true. Most Americans assume that foreign women are vulnerable and simply looking for a ticket out of poverty. How wrong they are.
My first wife was American, and we divorced in 1996 after I discovered she was a money-hungry, lying, cheating adulteress. On top of that, she made a desperate grab for as much money as she could get from my business—a publicly traded software company that I founded. After that experience, I decided never to marry again and to live the life of a bachelor. However, over the past two years, the priest at my church (I am Catholic), who is from Colombia, encouraged me to marry again and suggested that I consider a Colombian woman. Interestingly, there are quite a few Colombians living in my own community who, at first glance, would seem like eligible women to start a relationship with. But his advice was different: he told me to go to Colombia and find a lady who has not been “spoiled” by what he calls “Americanization.” So here I am, taking his advice.
However, if you were to get Amy’s opinion on this, she would claim it’s because I am such a “loser” who can’t find a compatible woman, and that I’m out to prey on some vulnerable woman from a developing country who is looking for a ticket out of poverty. I have news for her: I wouldn’t marry another woman from the U.S. if my life depended on it. Just a little background on me: I hold a PhD in Computer Science from Stanford University, I am the Founder and CEO of a publicly traded software company, and I serve as a guest professor at XXXX Tech. There are plenty of American women who would happily marry me, but I am convinced most of them would do it for the wrong reasons—which is exactly why I never remarried. In my case, it’s not because I am a loser; it’s because of my hard work, accomplishments, and financial stability that many American women would see me as their “easy ticket.” That is what I want to avoid at all costs.
I have dated some very lovely ladies from Latin America (Brazil, Argentina, Peru, Mexico, and Venezuela) whom I met through business circles while traveling overseas. They are educated, intelligent, cultured, and accomplished, yet at the same time they are loving, tender, caring, and humble. However, I have never been to Colombia, nor have I had the opportunity to date any Colombian women, which is why I am hoping your service will help me achieve my goals. I applaud the service you are providing and wish you the absolute best in your life together and in your future plans.
Those are some great responses you have on your site to those dogmatic letters. It is amusing to me that you are accused of “exploiting people’s hopes and dreams.” Of the four definitions of exploit, only one of them is negative. Consider the following dictionary definitions of exploit when used as a noun:
An act or deed, especially a brilliant or heroic one. See Synonyms at feat.
When used as a verb:
1. To employ to the greatest possible advantage: exploit one’s talents.
2. To make use of selfishly or unethically: a country that exploited peasant labor. See Synonyms at manipulate.
3. To advertise; promote.
All other things aside, if you were approaching this selfishly, I seriously doubt you would take the time to publish antagonistic letters on your site and then respond to them with reasoned, thoughtful replies.
I found your website totally by accident. Honestly, I had some preconceived notions about foreign or arranged marriages, but after reading the “hate-mail” page I found myself nodding in agreement with your responses.
If you help people find happiness, so what! These days plenty of people meet their perfect match online — I personally know several couples who did, even if their first face-to-face meeting happened in their hometowns or somewhere else in Canada, where I’m from. What difference does it make if the woman (or man) is from a “developing” nation? If they share common ground and neither person is marrying for citizenship or looking for a “doormat,” then I have nothing but kudos to give. And by the way, it’s incredibly demeaning to stereotype Asian and Latin women. The ones I know from these backgrounds would be highly offended to be labeled less “independent” than Caucasians; and even if they choose a more “traditional” role in a relationship, with their own volition and desire, so what!
We find new things about ourselves every day. I never thought I’d be writing an approving email to a so-called “mail-order brides” service. Anyway, keep helping people find each other, and don’t let the naysayers get you down.
Thanks, and good luck! Wow, I’m no lesbian, but your wife is a knockout!
As a 43-year-old American man who has traveled extensively, I can clearly and truthfully say that by the law of large numbers American women have become increasingly undesirable to American men. In general, American women have had nearly four generations of spoiled entitlement. They have become far less feminine, try to compete with men as men, have grown complacent and overweight, and have become overly critical, and frankly thoroughly undesirable.
A recent government study reported that 50% of marriage-aged American men are not interested in marrying any time soon, and another 25% are committed lifelong bachelors who have no interest in marrying an American woman. Feminism has left an indelible mark on the country, and now men and children are the ones who suffer the consequences.
The unfortunate truth is that more than 65% of American marriages will end in divorce, and nearly three out of four will be initiated by the woman. The man will get torn apart in family court. He will lose the house. He will see his children only two out of fourteen days, assuming his ex does not throw out unsubstantiated abuse claims. He will be forced to hand over 40–50% of his take-home pay. If he loses his job due to illness or downsizing, the state will throw him in jail. While he is jailed, the arrearage will grow and the state will add interest. The state will revoke his driver’s and professional licenses, making him almost unemployable.
If you were to take up skydiving and the instructor told you that most of the parachutes were defective, would you still jump?
So if an American man wants to raise a family with a woman who actually enjoys being a wife and mother, he has to look outside the U.S. borders. Many men, including myself, would love to have a wife and family. I have two undergraduate degrees and an MBA from Duke University. I earn a strong income, and you could not pay me enough to marry an American woman. First, the odds are high that I would not get to keep the family I support. Second, I prefer a woman who is genuinely feminine. I have found that most foreign women are unapologetically feminine. They are women, they like being women, and they prefer that I am a man — not a neutered house pet like far too many American men have become. So Amy, regarding your point, I do denigrate American women who have tried to behave like men. And if you doubt that many men feel this way, look at the countless sites created by American men who have had enough and now vote “no” to American women.
I send all my best wishes for bringing capable, honest American men together with feminine and honest foreign young women. It is far closer to a match made in heaven than the chaotic and self-centered version of marriage that American culture has turned into.
I have read word for word your attempt to explain things to the deaf ear, or the “one-sided ear,” of Amy. Besides her lack of facts, which she tried to weasel around, I don’t believe she expected an intelligent man with the facts to explain to her that, just like women, men also want freedom of choice. I believe that she, like so many American women, just wants to be heard and has no interest in hearing anything in return. She is a typical American feminist who thinks that words are only worth hearing if they come from a woman’s mouth. You did men a huge service, and you made everyone I shared this with proud of your truth. I have shared your article and conversation with both men and women.
I am a divorced man of three years from a failed marriage to an American woman that lasted five years and cost me 1.1 million dollars with no children. She was unfaithful in our marriage. From women’s perspective I should have given her another chance. But when a man with two children I know cheated on his wife, the same women said that his wife should leave him. Once again, a biased point of view.
Your service is giving good men a chance to have a fulfilling life. It seems like Amy is upset that men don’t have to put up with the unachievable goals and emotional roller coaster of American women. We just don’t need them anymore. They should be nervous because they will become a dying breed and there will be a lot of lonely American women in the years to come. There are still many great American women, but those women are now in the minority. A lot of American women forgot what once made them so special — being a woman. My mother was the backbone of the family, the moral setter, and the nurturer of the children. Men are simple in what we want. When we bring emotional or financial support into a relationship, we want to feel loved for it, just as we would love and support our partner in life. Somewhere in the last twenty years, women began to feel automatically entitled to the best the world has to offer with no contribution whatsoever. It seems like many American women think they were born a princess. How naive. It is great that men now have the same rights as women to choose who they want to be with. Keep up the good work of creating long-lasting and successful relationships for both men and women. And like Amy herself said, it shouldn’t matter where the women are from.
I was cruising the web, and to be honest, I don’t know how I ended up on your site, but it struck my curiosity. I read the “hate mail” section, and right away I wanted to say that your approach was an excellent way to address criticisms. I think you are providing a service like any other free person, and if someone does not like it, they are free not to use it. I have been on the receiving end of being used for a “green card,” and I met her right here in the United States. If the people who criticize you think we have to go outside the USA to experience that, then they clearly have not looked at the statistics for illegal aliens in this country. I wonder if these same people send critical emails to any of the large international dating services. Probably not, since those companies seem to cater to women more than men. It appears that anytime there is a service that might benefit a man, it is immediately viewed as intolerable. I am not saying your service is for men only, but judging from the attitude of most women here in the U.S., they assume the women on your site do not benefit and aren’t intelligent enough to make their own choices. While your services are not something I would be in a financial position to try, I still think it is a great service. People say God put someone on this earth for each of us, but that doesn’t mean she lives down the street from you. I love Latin and Hispanic women, and I find it a wonderful idea that I wouldn’t have to wade through the local club and bar scene to find a match. I wonder if the women who write to you saying “they are just using you to escape poverty” have ever heard of the classic American “gold digger.” Do they honestly believe we have to go to another country to get used financially? I live in Atlanta, and trust me, I don’t have to go far to find that. I just wanted to say that I support your efforts and think you should stay strong and continue. If you make even one couple happy, then it is all worth it in the end.
I read your articles and your description of what South American women have to offer. I have to say that I am currently married to a Colombian woman whom I met here in the United States. I was married for seven years to an American woman who gave me two beautiful children, but I was fooling myself if I thought I would ever find someone totally devoted to me in mind, body, and soul. This is not to say that there are no American women who can be that way, but time and time again, I was disappointed. After a short relationship, I married this divorced woman from Colombia. She is, incidentally, a citizen of the United States and has been for ten years now. I was almost uncomfortable with the total attention she paid to me — my feelings, my well-being, and the loving, caring way she treated me. I am an average man of average means with average looks, but none of that mattered to her. All she wanted was someone who cared for her as she cared for me. This sounds simple enough, almost like common sense, but being 52 years old, I had never experienced that kind of devotion. No matter how hard I tried to please any American girl or woman, it never seemed good enough. I had almost given up. My wife and I visit Colombia every year because family is of the utmost importance to her, and whether it is hers or mine, it is always the top priority, above everything else. Family also includes my two children from my previous marriage, and my mother — who absolutely adores my wife. She is the first woman my mother ever felt was good enough for me, or liked at all.
There is, however, one drawback to this, and although it is minuscule, one must know this in getting into a relationship with a Latin American woman. Because their passion is beyond compare, this also goes for their occasional temper. More often than not, they become angry because they care so much for something or someone but nonetheless, it can be surprising the first time you see it. It took me some time to figure this out. Believe me though, the 1% of meltdowns do not even come close to discounting these beautiful, caring, passionate women. They don’t want your money. They don’t want your things. They want to be loved and that to them, is priceless. I thank God every day for my good fortune in meeting this woman and cherish her every day. I truly believe that my relationship is so true when I said “till death do us part.” Take my word for it gentlemen. A lifetime of happiness only costs you your love and caring. Both of these incidentally are absolutely free! I don’t know anything about this service being provided, but what I do know is that the percentage of women who are not in ‘put on a pedestal’ status is the total reverse of how it is here in the States. For every bad apple here, there are 99 goddesses in South America. I’d say take a chance but really… It’s a sure thing.
I stumbled on your website while looking for statistics regarding the happiness of “foreign” marriages versus local ones. While it didn’t answer that question, I was impressed by your arguments against the critics. Basically, the position you reiterate time and time again is that people ought to be free to make their own dissociative and associative decisions — using the criteria of their own choice — without being hampered by the paternalism or materialism of others. Being a hard-core libertarian, this is something that greatly appeals to me. The other interesting thing is that people keep referring to the possible unfortunate situations brides-to-be may have in their home country, as if that is somehow the fault of the husband-to-be. Instead of seeing him as a knight in shining armor, he is portrayed as an abuser and a victimizer.
I don’t know how I ended up on your site, but I read the back and forth with Amy and Barbara and your responses. It was quite interesting. I felt sad — as an American woman — to read the anger-filled hate mail coming from other American women.
I understand the concerns some American women might have after investigative reports uncovered human trafficking and sex-slavery schemes hiding behind mail-order bride businesses. However, I don’t blame Latina women for wanting an American husband. In my opinion, American men are some of the best in the world. Without the support of American men, would the women’s rights movement have ever succeeded? Most American men who embrace and embody the salt-of-the-earth American values are marriage material. As long as these women are treated with the same respect and freedoms that American women have come to expect, then I don’t see a problem with it.
I am a mother, wife, business owner, and Catholic American woman. This combination of old-school moral values and modern business drive has made me a target for hateful women like the ones emailing you with their disdain for your services. Modern American women often expect other modern American women to discard their religious or moral values in the pursuit of equal rights. I love being a mother and a wife. I also enjoy working and supporting my family. My husband is a wounded warrior American combat veteran. He almost gave up on finding a quality American woman because of the disgusting level of materialism he saw in the women he dated.
Women who claim to be for women’s rights have judged me because of my faith and my belief in marriage and tending to the home. My situation is different. Because my husband is a wounded warrior, I work to provide extra income for our family. It is a partnership eight years in the making. Most men want that partnership. They want love and respect. Most American men are not looking for a Latina slave. I have Latina friends and family members. I understand the culture and the value placed on family and on love. Some American women have lost sight of what it means to be a woman. But in defense of American women like myself who still embody these rare qualities — yes, we do still exist. I don’t blame your customers for using your service to find a life partner, a wife, and a mother who celebrates being a woman and who loves her man for being a man.
I have to tell you, I’ve been entertaining thoughts of traveling to Latin America for many reasons, and not the least of which is that I find the women of these regions to possess an almost unbelievable beauty of heart, soul, mind, and body. I am drawn in by their culture of caring and kindness, their pride, their confidence, and a quality that is extremely rare here in the USA — the truly feminine woman.
I mention this because I have just read through the “hate mail” on your site. I must say that I’m repulsed by the almost violent objection to the services you provide. Feminine women, women who appreciate good men and who are appreciated in return, and, to put it bluntly, women who don’t feel the need to castrate their mates in order to justify a misplaced sense of entitlement, are in my opinion one of the true miracles of humanity.
Women in general are the foundation of all that is good; it is a woman’s touch that has guided the hand of man since the beginning. Men in general are simple creatures; it takes little to make him happy and a lot to make him otherwise. Like the faithful dog, a happy man will break his back with a smile on his face to receive what only the kind of woman I speak of can provide. I speak of these things with some authority, as I was blessed to have spent a good portion of my adult life in the company of one such woman.
To the bitter author of hate, I cannot help but read between the lines. As for your concerns for the women of Latin America in their pursuit of what all people aspire to, they are grossly misplaced. There are women’s causes throughout the world that deserve far greater attention. Why would you want to interfere with something as beautiful as men and women moving forward together in that quest?
Jamie, the service you provide, I feel, goes far beyond what you may have intended. Keep up the excellent work.
To present an argument based in hate and bitterness, one that conforms to some pathetic dogma, requires a cloak of altruism, a heroic quest for the greater good, and a villain. I see a contrived display of heart-wrenching concern from the author who claims to be brought to tears by the plight of the so-called impoverished women of Latin America being preyed upon by the so-called loser predators from the north. Uncloaked, it all boils down to demeaning those women and the men who find them irresistible for all the reasons stated earlier. It is done in a desperate attempt to comfort themselves when faced with the harsh reality created by the feminist movement in its extremist form — a condition that, sadly, has become the accepted norm for all but the non-conforming among us. They have painted themselves into a corner and have come to hate the men they assumed would be theirs exclusively, men expected to spoil them without any need for reciprocation, gratitude, or respect. You, Jamie, are their worst nightmare. A villain for sure. Anyone who disagrees with their weak point of view is cast as having a nineteenth-century mindset. But, as evidenced by the alarming divorce rate in the U.S., its effect on the American family, and the willingness of good American men to travel thousands of miles in search of a good woman, this will be the legacy of their efforts. All I can say is thank goodness for the Internet making the world a smaller place.
I meet people frequently who are looking for the “right” person to share life with. Sometimes you have to leave your own backyard to find them, and I see nothing wrong with it. If critics don’t like it, they can change the channel. I don’t view the girls as something to be bought, sold, or traded.
I had an experience with a Colombian girl that occurred thirty years ago when we were in college in California. She was very beautiful. She would often tell me about Colombia and how the men there “cheat” without batting an eye. It is part of the machismo culture prevalent in all Latin countries — or maybe all countries for that matter.
She graduated a year before me, so rather than stay the extra year she returned home to set up her business and waited for me to join her after my graduation. A year is an eternity when you are that young. During that time, she had visits from her ex-boyfriend, and little by little he chipped away at her loneliness. She surrendered to him, and left my heart crushed four months before I was supposed to join her. I guess I didn’t matter to her at that point, so I withdrew from myself and from women for a long time.
Five years later, I received a phone call from my former landlord informing me that she was visiting California and wanted all of us to get together for dinner in Ventura. She was still single. I drove up from Malibu, and as I walked into the restaurant I saw her from across the room, though she hadn’t noticed me yet. I slowed down, taking a moment to look at the woman I had suffered over all those years earlier. My first thought was that I was a different person now, and as I looked at her I realized I could never get those feelings back. As I approached, she looked up at me with a clear look of embarrassment. But I kindly took her hand and told her it was nice to see her again. Five old friends were gathered around the table enjoying the moment. It was a good evening, and I was glad she had called our landlord to bring us together.
After dinner, we talked for a bit, and she asked me for my address and phone number. I gave them to her and we parted. Two days later she called and asked me to meet her at a store in Los Angeles. I went to see her. She said she was returning to Colombia the next morning and asked if I would drive her to the airport. I thought she might tell me more about her life, so I agreed. She asked how I was feeling, and I told her my life had changed. She wondered if I still felt the old days were good times and if I could ever see us happening again. I looked at her and said that yes, they were good times then, but I am seeing someone now and I am happy with my life as it is.
The point of all this is that we are all the same when we are looking for a lasting love and the commitment of marriage. No one lives happily ever after, but if you stick together you can come damn close. For me, that would be good enough.
I have dated many women since then and even lived for nine years with one. It isn’t the same. If there is anything wrong in our American culture, it is the notion that freedom applies to all areas of our lives. It does not. When you are serious about a relationship with someone, your life is not yours alone anymore. If you have chosen wisely, if the hearts are in sync and the emotions interconnected, you become part of a union. Man and woman were meant to be together, to hold each other up, and to be there for one another when this rat-hole world takes its toll. There are some people who will never find it or may never care to. I hope I am not one of those.
Nothing matters more in this life than to be wanted by someone. How you find it does not matter. All I see you doing is offering a choice. A viewer can step forward, change his life, and bring some joy into a girl’s life, or he can go elsewhere. Unhappy people will always make unhappy comments about something that could actually do some good — something they don’t understand. Misery loves company. I have encountered men and women who would qualify as losers in any country. And yes, I even know some young, beautiful, wealthy women here in America who are losers.
I prefer to see the hope you offer those willing to take the chance.
Was just on your website and LOVED the exchange between you and that man-hating femi-nazi, Amy. I bet you get all kinds of letters like that. I’m a 28-year-old unmarried professional, and even though I don’t feel I’m ready or financially able to take advantage of a service like yours, I really appreciate what you do.
Isn’t it ridiculous how angry these goofball women get? The irony is that the Amys of the U.S. are the reason we American men look elsewhere. I’m telling you, the traditional American woman is gone. Good luck getting them to pop a bag of popcorn for you. All I see when I look around are women who want to take, take, take and never give. It’s disgusting. And just like the saying “denial ain’t just a river in Egypt,” I really don’t believe most of these American women when they deny that they are financially motivated in their guy search. By the way, this is only going to get worse, because the younger generations coming up — raised on MTV — all feel that they’re owed all the ridiculous garbage American pop culture feeds them.
Keep up the good fight. I apologize for being crass, but I’d be willing to bet the contents of my wallet that Amy is an ugly, butch-haired, pig-faced, lesbian anyway. Either that, or she was in a relationship with a good man and she decided it would be okay to throw on 50 pounds and turn into a harpy. We American dudes have a tough cross to bear. There’s a sea of these women out there. The scary thing is that sometimes they hide it before you take the plunge. Once the “I do” happens, then the real medusa comes out. It’s my biggest fear. I see many of my buddies, only in their 20s, already stuck in these types of marriages.
I’m moving to Japan in two weeks. It will be interesting to try the dating scene there. However, my heart lies with the beauty of Latin American culture and women. What man’s heart doesn’t flutter a bit at the idea of a woman who’s ready to be a real woman: to be feminine, beautiful, traditional, sexy, and devoted to their family. It’s sad that the dudes who live in these countries crap all over their women. Maybe they would be more appreciative if they could see the “Rosie O’Donnell’s” we have to put up with.
